forever blue

Mommie Dearest,
In less than a week, thirteen years will have passed since you flew away home so suddenly.  That's 156 months, imagine that...thirteen springs, thirteen summers, thirteen autumns, thirteen winters.  Or, to put it another way, it's been 676 weeks.  I've counted the days, too...4,745...since I last spoke to you.  I think I'll be forever blue.

But, how could I blame you...there's no place like home, and you really are finally home, safe in the Father's house.  But, left behind, I've had 113,880 hours to miss you.  I think I'll be forever blue.

Everyone said, "it gets better with time..." but who are they fooling when I've spent 6,832,800 minutes without you.  I think I'll be forever blue.

Sometimes, I just burst into tears for no apparent reason.  I miss the sound of your voice, always so cheery.  I miss hearing you say, "Hi, Honey! What's new?"  I guess I'll be forever blue.

What's it like up there?  Can you see me?  Can you hear me?  I just wish you could give me a clue.  I guess I'll be forever blue.

But, wait...I forgot to tell you...in the mornings, upstairs in my study, I pretend you are there, too.  I have your favorite Bible, and when I touch it, hold it, read it, I feel closer to you.  Maybe I won't be forever blue.

I love to read the verses you've marked and the notes that came straight from your heart.  I get a sense of your nearness, whenever I realize that I've marked the same ones, too.  Maybe I won't be forever blue.

It's hard to explain, but I'm so very happy, too.  I just miss my mama, and that's you!  But, maybe I won't be forever blue...maybe just until I get home, too.  Leave the light on for me.